I’ve always been thinking of a beautiful story since I open an account at blogger dot com. I never thought it would last up to now and I don’t have any yet to post. It’s been a month. HAHAHA! Maybe I should start posting today, since this is the last day of year 2008. That’s why, I’m posting this article-slash-short story-slash-feature-slash-essay which entails my greatest realization this year.
I’m always busy, that’s what I know. I’ve been busy loving someone who’s been busy himself adoring someone else. HAHAHA! I’ve always thought I’ll be happy if I have him. I’ve always thought that I’ve been in love with him. Yeah! I’ve always thought of loving him.
Just what a beautiful adage “nothing’s permanent in this world except for change”, I’ve thought of changing too, more exactly, a change of heart. Well, I don’t have to ask for it because it naturally happens. I only need to wait until finally it will. Hours, days, months, years, how long will it take? I don’t know. But I do hope for the soonest possible. And that’s what I’m looking forward into this coming year. As the year starts, I wish that this old self will also find more of growing ups to do. I have made a lot of mistake; I never regret that, rather I’m thankful it did happen. And if there’s something I have loved doing since the first day of 2008, it’s the thought of LOVING him. Yeah! It’s only in my mind, it never happens for real.
I don’t know exactly when and where it started, but few weeks ago, I found out that I was never really in love with this guy. Maybe it’s because, I never knew love after all. I just thought I do. Now tell me, how I am supposed to tell it is love if I was never really sure it is. Oh, whatever! I knew deep down inside me, I’m hopeful for all the possibilities this year to come…. That’s the spirit.....
